Know Your Audience

Or in this case, who it is you’re flipping the bird to.

Gastown is always busy on summer evenings.  An area near the heart of Vancouver and filled with history, tourists and trendy eateries, Gastown draws the good and the bad – drivers, that is.

The road through Gastown is paved with cobblestones.  Even when dry the cobbles are slippery and have been responsible for more than a few car accidents and near-misses (right, Sartori?).  Add heavy pedestrian and vehicle traffic, and you have to drive like your very existence depends on it. 

I had my driving skills put to the test one night when a woman raced her car through a stop sign and straight at the side of my truck.  I stood on the brakes and cranked the wheel.  I’d like to think the force I placed on the center of my steering wheel had a contributing effect, but in that second I knew no amount of horn blasting was going to make a difference – she was either going to t-bone me or not.

She didn’t. I zigged right, she zagged left, and we both fish-tailed. She didn’t even seem to be too concerned, as her hand shot through the sunroof with her middle finger extended as she glared at me in her rearview mirror. 


One ‘Fail to Stop at Stop Sign’ ticket later, I sent the woman on her way.  She tried to apologise, saying she hadn’t realized I was a cop.  When I asked her who she thought I was, she replied, “Some asshole.” 

Wrong answer.

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